Part 3 (Mike and Tonya Jones)
In August 2008, I noticed a sore spot on my left testicle. I spent the next month telling myself, I need to go get checked out. I told myself it was probably nothing, and I ignored the pain. Finally, it was hurting so bad, that I could not put this off. I had to go to the doctor. The doctor looked at me, and said it was probably nothing. He still referred me to another doctor at the Urology Centers of Alabama, just to be safe. They did a sonogram and determined I had a testicular tumor. At this point, all that could be done, was to remove the testicle, and send it off for testing. I had surgery on Friday, November 21, 2008.
In August 2008, I noticed a sore spot on my left testicle. I spent the next month telling myself, I need to go get checked out. I told myself it was probably nothing, and I ignored the pain. Finally, it was hurting so bad, that I could not put this off. I had to go to the doctor. The doctor looked at me, and said it was probably nothing. He still referred me to another doctor at the Urology Centers of Alabama, just to be safe. They did a sonogram and determined I had a testicular tumor. At this point, all that could be done, was to remove the testicle, and send it off for testing. I had surgery on Friday, November 21, 2008.
I remember being concerned about the effects this surgery may have. My wife and I were trying to get pregnant with our second child. We had been trying since July. We were both up early, Tuesday, November 25, sitting at the kitchen table, enjoying a rare breakfast with each other. We were awaiting the results of the biopsy test. It was very unusual for Tonya to wake up early when I do and have breakfast with me. She did this particular morning. She made the comment that she felt a little sick, and jokingly mentioned, that she might be pregnant. Tonya called me at work, around 10:00 that morning, and told me that she was indeed pregnant! About 2:00 that afternoon, I received a call from my doctor's office. They told me the test results were in. They confirmed it was testicular cancer. Praise God, He gave us good news of the pregnancy before the cancer bomb was dropped on us! This was very comforting and confirming that God is with us, and He cares deeply about us. He was basically telling us not to worry about the pregnancy. He was taking care of that for us. What a blessing!
The doctor told me there are two types of cancer; seminoma and non-seminoma. He said in my case, I had a seminoma tumor, which is the least aggressive kind, and the cancer was most likely, contained in the testicle. They also recommended I undergo radiation treatment to the lymph nodes in my midsection. This was basically for insurance, to take care of anything that could have spread on a cellular level. They expected a less than 2% chance of recurrence, after the radiation treatments. Apparently, Lance Armstrong, the tour de France competitor, had the same cancer. His was the non-seminoma, the more aggressive kind, and it had spread to his brain and lungs. He was cured with chemotherapy. The doctors said this was the best cancer to have if you had to pick one. The treatments they have for this, show almost a 100% cure rate.
I received radiation treatments, basically, the entire month of February 2009. It was around 17 treatments. I remember one of the struggles I had with this, besides being nauseated, was the mental aspect. I was 41 at the time. When I went for treatments, all I saw were 70 year old men, getting treated for prostate cancer. This was hard because I did not feel that I fit in. Being a younger man, it was hard mentally to deal with that. It made me feel so old.
I remember my last day of treatment. Tonya and Matthew (my son) had picked me up earlier that morning. We had gone to Tonya’s doctor appointment and had the 20 week sonogram. We found out that we were going to have a baby girl. We had picked out the name Lydia. We went to lunch and then they dropped me off for my treatment. As I was lying on that table, I kept thinking about how blessed I was, to have found out we were having a baby girl, the same day as my last treatment. God is good!
After the radiation treatments, the plan was to do a CT scan every three months for one year, then every six months for a few years, and then every year out to about five years. They do this in an effort to monitor me, in case the cancer comes back. The first scan was sometime in June or July. Unfortunately, the results showed two suspicious over sized lymph nodes, in my small intestine area. The doctors told me this was extremely rare, for this type of cancer, to spread to this area. The radiation treatments I had, did not treat this area of my body. After a needle biopsy, the tissue obtained, confirmed it was cancer. They told me I would have to undergo chemotherapy treatment. I started chemotherapy treatments in October of 2009, and they ran through December 2009. My last treatment was on December 14, 2009. I had to have three cycles of chemotherapy. One cycle, which was three weeks long, consisted of one week of five days in a row of treatments, and then two weeks with a treatment only on Monday.
It was either the first or second day of my treatments, when God laid on my heart, to take this one day at a time. It was too difficult. I could not allow myself to think about how long I had to have treatments. God was helping me deal with things better. He told me to only think about today. Jesus said in Matthew 6:34 "So do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."
This became my focus each day. I only worried about getting through that day. He really helped me with this. Towards the end, I did begin to think about having only four treatments left, or only three more treatments left, but by that time, I was thinking of it in a good light, because I was almost done. The treatments were really tough! It was a good thing God helped me narrow my focus to the present, so that I would not get overwhelmed, and lose heart. Praise God! He is with us! This leads me to my intention for writing this, and that is to document the lessons learned from this experience:
Focus On My Relationship With God: During a major illness like I experienced, all the things in which you put your faith and trust in are exposed, one by one. It is like standing up real quick and having a head rush. Everything blacks out except the area of your vision directly in front of you. All the things by which you obtain your identity, and put your trust in, kind of fade into the peripheral vision. The only thing left is your fears and God. This happened to me. The things I tend to obtain my identity from are my job and my relationship with my wife. Also, my reliance on self, most of the time, instead of God. The job and relationship with my wife are not bad things, in and of themselves, but there is a need to be careful, to not let them drive who you are. My fears were of dying. It occurred to me, if it's God's will for me to die now; how I am going to witness to others? I wanted to live strong in my Christianity, strong in my faith, strong to the end. If this was His plan, then so be it. Coming to grips with that was important. The next fear was very sorrowful to think about; leaving Tonya with two kids, as well as leaving Matthew and Lydia without a father. God had shown me, that He had taken care of us this far, He would certainly take care of them still. So, my fears were disarmed one by one. I was left standing there, just God and myself. This really was a blessed time; a closeness that I had not felt in that way before. It was a refocusing time for me. I just hope and pray that I can learn from this experience and not slip right back into those old habits again.
This became my focus each day. I only worried about getting through that day. He really helped me with this. Towards the end, I did begin to think about having only four treatments left, or only three more treatments left, but by that time, I was thinking of it in a good light, because I was almost done. The treatments were really tough! It was a good thing God helped me narrow my focus to the present, so that I would not get overwhelmed, and lose heart. Praise God! He is with us! This leads me to my intention for writing this, and that is to document the lessons learned from this experience:
Focus On My Relationship With God: During a major illness like I experienced, all the things in which you put your faith and trust in are exposed, one by one. It is like standing up real quick and having a head rush. Everything blacks out except the area of your vision directly in front of you. All the things by which you obtain your identity, and put your trust in, kind of fade into the peripheral vision. The only thing left is your fears and God. This happened to me. The things I tend to obtain my identity from are my job and my relationship with my wife. Also, my reliance on self, most of the time, instead of God. The job and relationship with my wife are not bad things, in and of themselves, but there is a need to be careful, to not let them drive who you are. My fears were of dying. It occurred to me, if it's God's will for me to die now; how I am going to witness to others? I wanted to live strong in my Christianity, strong in my faith, strong to the end. If this was His plan, then so be it. Coming to grips with that was important. The next fear was very sorrowful to think about; leaving Tonya with two kids, as well as leaving Matthew and Lydia without a father. God had shown me, that He had taken care of us this far, He would certainly take care of them still. So, my fears were disarmed one by one. I was left standing there, just God and myself. This really was a blessed time; a closeness that I had not felt in that way before. It was a refocusing time for me. I just hope and pray that I can learn from this experience and not slip right back into those old habits again.
Worship God Everyday: Towards the end of the first week of my treatments, I had a bad stomach problem. I felt as though I was being eaten from the inside out. Apparently, the chemotherapy affected the lining of my stomach, and the stomach acid was burning me. It was pretty bad. The doctor put me on Protonics, which is medication to stop my stomach from producing stomach acid, or at least cut down on it. This took a few days to take effect. In the meantime, I was in constant pain. I remember laying in bed, in the fetal position, crying. All I could do was praise God. I felt like if this was my last breath, then I was going to praise Him till the end!
Pray For Our Spouse/Family: I was pretty much worthless around the house during my illness. I could hardly do much more than sit on the couch. When I did work, it was part time, and when I got home, I would pass out on the couch. I was worried for Tonya and the kids when my treatments first began. I was not able to help out with the kids and around the house as I typically try to do. I knew it was a lot on Tonya. Lydia was just about two months old when my treatments began. When people would ask me how I was doing, they would tell me they were praying for me. I would ask them to pray, especially for Tonya and the kids, because I knew it was so hard on them too. I prayed for Tonya. I remember praying for God to bless her with energy, His energy. I prayed boldly that God would bless her with supernatural energy. Looking back on it now, He definitely answered my prayer. There were times, when she would stay up with Lydia at night, not get much sleep, and she would be good the next day. It was amazing how much God blessed Tonya. She would even comment at times, that she had an awesome energy; that she did not understand where it was coming from, other than God. I did not tell her I was praying for her until after my treatments were over. I think it speaks to us, that God is definitely there, cares deeply for us, and He answers prayers.
God placed an important job on me. As head of the house, and spiritual leader of my home, it is important that I take that role seriously. When I am doing my job, holding my family up, and walking in His ways, I feel great blessings from God. God is good! When my treatments were over, and I began to recover, Tonya began to have much difficulty; I attributed it to not praying for her anymore. I guess I figured that she didn't need God as much, because I was beginning to become more of a help around the house. I had progressed in my recovery. I realized quickly, that I should pray for her and my family all the time, that it's very important.
Don’t Think Too Highly Of Yourself: As I stated before, I felt old during my radiation, and chemotherapy treatments. I watched the others at the treatment center, every day I was there. Most of them were much older, some were very pitiful, not even able to sit up, very sick. They would roll them in on beds, give them a treatment, then roll them back to their hospital room. I am not trying to be insensitive here. It's just that, I have been blessed with very good health, my whole life, up to this point. Even my parents, and most all of my immediate family, have really never had any bad health issues. I realized that good health is not guaranteed. I am no better than anyone else and I don’t necessarily deserve good health. If you have good health, you are really blessed. There are so many sick people in this world. We don’t tend to see them much, unless the sickness impacts your immediate family. Until I was diagnosed with cancer, I had not been impacted with severe illness. This was a huge lesson. I'm not taking my health for granted any more!
One Day At A Time: As discussed above, in times of extreme difficulty, God showed me the verse Matthew 6:34. Why would I not think this would apply, at any time in my life? Of course it applies! I need to adopt this teaching Jesus gave us every day; worry only about the cares of today. The verse tells me that Jesus did not hide the fact that we will experience trouble. He also did not ignore the fact that we naturally worry about things. He just urges us to only worry about the trouble of today. Actually, He urges us not to worry about things, but to bring our troubles to Him, who loves us, and helps us.
Compassion For Others: Tonya suggested to me, that God may be teaching me, to have even greater compassion for others, especially the sick. He's teaching me to have empathy with those who are really sick. Compassion for the sick, is an emotion I do not naturally have. God will have to help me with this. In times of opportunity, God let me see how I can minister to those in need. I shared my story with a friend, and their Bible group. He mentioned that he has a radio series, where he talks about moving from sympathy to empathy, as a result of our experiences. He thinks that is what God has done in me.
My experience leaves me with a deep appreciation for what God has done for me and my family. I cannot simply let that go and not share it with others. I think of the Apostle Paul, when he returned from his first missionary journey. He shared with the church at Antioch, all that God had done with them and through them. This was done, to encourage the brethren in their church. I think this is a vital part of our Christian responsibility today; to share our experiences, namely what God has done with us, through us, and with all those around us that we love.
Praise God!
Mike Jones
Praise God!
Mike Jones
Romans 8:37-39
...In all these things we are more that conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither the height nor the depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus or Lord.
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